Who else to be
by Xxxx4evaSummerxxxx
Summary: Riley the innocent/Maya the fighter/Farkle the nerd/Lucas the moral compass/ They didn't know who else to be, besides who they pretend to be. (One-shot)


**a/n: Hello everyone! I'm so sorry I haven't updated or posted stories in a while. Senior year has been crazy hectic. But I'm excited to start posting again. This is a one-shot involving Farkle, Lucas, Maya and Riley and how they all have problems they don't notice in each other. It's slightly inspired by events in Girl Meets Yearbook and Girl Meets Creativity. I don't own the show.I hope you enjoy.**

Riley Matthews stared at her ceiling as the time ticked by. Midnight turned to one in the morning and one in morning turned into two in the morning. Her mind raced with thoughts she couldn't didn't dare to speak out loud. Like why she cared so much about what others think about her. Why she cared so much about others and not herself. Why she acts like the world is rainbow and sunshine when she knows it's not. She always told herself she was sunshine because other people in her life needed sunshine, but she never thought she acted like sunshine so she could protect herself from the darkness. When Maya said Riley was the one who taught her about letting the light in, she never thought it would stick with Maya. She thought Maya didn't have hope for anything, it was the fact that Maya believed in something so pure as light when she couldn't. But she acts innocent, like everything in this world is pure. She does it for Maya, Lucas and Farkle. She does it for all of them, because she doesn't know who else to be.

Maya Hart stared out her window as she watched the moonlight hit the city. She couldn't sleep until the sun lite up sky. She thought the sky was kind of like her mind. Full of such darkness for so long. Then something changes. It was like a switch. The sun rises and everything turns golden and the light brightens the darkness. As sun rays hit the darkest place in the city, there was light. The light Riley taught her to let it. It was like there was a reason for hope. It was like when she is with her friends, all the darkness goes away, and the sun makes the world shine bright. When she was with Riley, her sunshine, all the bad things disappeared and everything is as beautiful as Riley is. When she was with Farkle she learned unconditional love. When she was with Lucas she learned that even when you tease someone, it will turn out fine. Their bickering was nothing compared to her parents. She loved their arguing for that. But as the sun sets in the sky, the darkness returns. The colors all go away, her golden sunshine slips behind the clouds. Like she slips back into the darkness. She realized hope is for suckers. Suckers like her, who think the darkness will actually go away. But if Maya were to be honest it never really goes away, all of it is a distraction. Until the next night. But she acts like a fighter, like the darkness never bothered her. She does it for Riley, Lucas and Farkle. She does it for all of them, because she doesn't know who else to be.

Farkle Minkus turns on his bedroom light on as his alarm clock states it's four in the morning. He searches through his closet and dresser for something to dress up the new him. He never told his friends this but he threw away all his turtle necks. When he told Lucas he needed to conquer himself first, he meant it. Insecurity has been eating him up since middle school started. When being Farkle wasn't good enough anymore he was desperate for a change. He wanted to throw away all reminders of his earlier self. He hated who he use to be. He needed this transformation. He didn't care if his friends liked the way he dressed. He felt better. He hates to sound cliche, but the darkness in his appearance would reflect the darkness he felt inside. He was done with the bright clothes, and his haircut and everything that made him, him. If he were to be honest, he didn't just throw away his turtle necks. He cut them up as he heard his parents have a screaming match. He hated the Farkle who believed in true love. He hated the Farkle who believed in something so pure. When he heard the clink of his mother's ring hit the floor, that's when decided to look for his beanie. But he acts like he is still the nerdy scientist, like he wants to run test and experiments when the only thing he wants is to run away from everything. He does it Riley, Maya and Lucas. He does it for all of them, because he doesn't know who else to be.

Lucas Frair watched as his mom looked through the bills and throws them on the ground with distress. He never felt such self-hatred in his life. He caused his parents to move to New York. He caused his mom to feel this way. He hated that he had no self control. He hated that he had anger issues. He hated how his genetic history screwed him over. He hated that he couldn't do anything when anger pulses through his veins and his heart is beating so loud he can't hear the screams of protest. He hates that he messes up anything good that happens in his life. He is not a fortune cookie, he is not a moral compass. He is someone who spends three days a week in anger management group therapy. He is someone who spends his night punching his wall until his knuckles turn purple. He is someone who tried to work on creating a new reputation just to lose it. But he acts like he is changed, like anger issues are something that magically go away, and becomes someone good. Who helps the people he cares about without punching the person who hurts them in the face. He acts that way for Riley, Farkle and Maya. He does it for all of them, because he doesn't know who else to be.

Maybe one day they will learn these secrets about each they will learn that all of them lie to each other on a daily lie about who they they did. How they are better. But no one else notices as someone else falls apart. They are to busy trying to make sure they are all fixed and put back together for the next day.

Riley the innocent.

Maya the fighter.

Farkle the nerd.

Lucas the moral compass.

They didn't know who else to be, besides who they pretend to be. Who would actually accept them for themselves? What they don't know is that they could all help each other. If someone actually admits they have a problem in the first place. Which is the starting point they will never reach. They'll just fight for the next day, hoping by then everything will be okay.

 **a/n: So I decided to write some dark, because writing helps me sort out my feelings. Sorry for not including Zay. It's just he hasn't been in enough episodes for me to write him just yet. I wanted to do something with all four of them, just for a change. I hope you enjoyed and thank you for reading.**

 **Have a wonderful day, lovelies.**

 **-Summer**


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